Post by The Resister on Oct 16, 2022 4:08:29 GMT
For the past several days I have not been able to be on the board nor fielding phone calls due to an unexpected death. Have I gained some real experience or what!
What I learned about death, dying, and funeral costs and such like would be worth a lot of money to you if you read this posting and use it. Let me set it up for you:
My wife had two sons. The older got a small whiff of fentanyl and it caused him a massive heart attack. He had no job and no assets along with not having no insurance. And here my odyssey began. My wife's son died in a parking lot and my wife and her younger son were on the phone with 911, trying to revive him. Help finally arrived and everybody made it to the hospital. Medical personnel could not revive my wife's son. So, the hospital staff led my wife and her other son into a small room with some broken medical equipment and left them there. I arrived an hour or so later. After I determined that the hospital staff had NO intention of every letting my wife see her son again at the hospital I got her to leave.
The issue is, when someone dies of unknown causes and the ambulance picks them up, the government orders an autopsy. AFTER the autopsy, the body is moved to the morgue of the family's choice. Now, my story is bizarre to say the least, so hopefully you won't get lost here. My wife and I along with her ex husband met with the funeral home officials. My wife's ex said that his brothers had offered to pay for the funeral, but I had to chime in. The funeral alone was 10 grand and we haven't even talked about a plot of ground for the man. So, the ex backs off and agrees to pay for a cremation and then a service at his church. Done deal?
Not quite. Her ex decided to back out of the deal and my wife went ballistic. We simply didn't have the money at the moment to do a funeral service. Sooo, the county stepped in and agreed to absorb the cost of cremation. Anyway, my wife agreed and a local church offered to let us hold a service in their church. Well, we're all set. Right? Noooo... If the county pays for a cremation service, the family has NO viewing rights. You may want to consider that. My wife's last memory of her son was having a heart attack in a parking lot and her trying to save his life. Well, the ex found out that there would be no public viewing since he broke the contract. The brothers who initially offered stepped up to the plate. Now, we could have an hour viewing time. But, now the father would get the urn and the ashes since his family paid for it. The funeral home decided to split the remains so my wife gets half.
The funeral home makes much ado about all they will do in a cremation for just over $4000. They say they will put the body in a "container" and the family can view the body and it will be in the container (sic) and you can see the top half of the body. I made note of that word container (sic) as it is a flimsy cardboard box that is folded in place. So, for $4000 you get to see the body for an hour, they put it an a cardboard box and then incinerate it (using a dollar's worth of gas) and stick the remains in a tiny box (the urn) and charge $200 + dollars for that. If you don't have life insurance, burial insurance, etc. this is the kind of burden you could lay on your family. And that's not inclusive of the family squabbles that can happen. Now, this man will have TWO funeral services in two different churches due to the cold heartedness of his father. What a clusterphuck! Don't burden your family with this expense. Plan now for it.
What I learned about death, dying, and funeral costs and such like would be worth a lot of money to you if you read this posting and use it. Let me set it up for you:
My wife had two sons. The older got a small whiff of fentanyl and it caused him a massive heart attack. He had no job and no assets along with not having no insurance. And here my odyssey began. My wife's son died in a parking lot and my wife and her younger son were on the phone with 911, trying to revive him. Help finally arrived and everybody made it to the hospital. Medical personnel could not revive my wife's son. So, the hospital staff led my wife and her other son into a small room with some broken medical equipment and left them there. I arrived an hour or so later. After I determined that the hospital staff had NO intention of every letting my wife see her son again at the hospital I got her to leave.
The issue is, when someone dies of unknown causes and the ambulance picks them up, the government orders an autopsy. AFTER the autopsy, the body is moved to the morgue of the family's choice. Now, my story is bizarre to say the least, so hopefully you won't get lost here. My wife and I along with her ex husband met with the funeral home officials. My wife's ex said that his brothers had offered to pay for the funeral, but I had to chime in. The funeral alone was 10 grand and we haven't even talked about a plot of ground for the man. So, the ex backs off and agrees to pay for a cremation and then a service at his church. Done deal?
Not quite. Her ex decided to back out of the deal and my wife went ballistic. We simply didn't have the money at the moment to do a funeral service. Sooo, the county stepped in and agreed to absorb the cost of cremation. Anyway, my wife agreed and a local church offered to let us hold a service in their church. Well, we're all set. Right? Noooo... If the county pays for a cremation service, the family has NO viewing rights. You may want to consider that. My wife's last memory of her son was having a heart attack in a parking lot and her trying to save his life. Well, the ex found out that there would be no public viewing since he broke the contract. The brothers who initially offered stepped up to the plate. Now, we could have an hour viewing time. But, now the father would get the urn and the ashes since his family paid for it. The funeral home decided to split the remains so my wife gets half.
The funeral home makes much ado about all they will do in a cremation for just over $4000. They say they will put the body in a "container" and the family can view the body and it will be in the container (sic) and you can see the top half of the body. I made note of that word container (sic) as it is a flimsy cardboard box that is folded in place. So, for $4000 you get to see the body for an hour, they put it an a cardboard box and then incinerate it (using a dollar's worth of gas) and stick the remains in a tiny box (the urn) and charge $200 + dollars for that. If you don't have life insurance, burial insurance, etc. this is the kind of burden you could lay on your family. And that's not inclusive of the family squabbles that can happen. Now, this man will have TWO funeral services in two different churches due to the cold heartedness of his father. What a clusterphuck! Don't burden your family with this expense. Plan now for it.