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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 9:36:47 GMT
Let's face it. America is falling apart and most of us come to discussion boards with the notion of saying something that may fix the overall condition of our country. Most of what is wrong is exemplified by looking at the number of people in jail or prison on drug related charges. We see a nation where the Posterity are more likely spending their money on tattoos and body piercings than on their dental health, mental health, or their ability to earn a living. Over half of the American people are drawing money out of the public dole. Why? What is going on? We have Drug Nation USA and the biggest drug distributor in the United States is the federal government backed up by the medical community. Divorce and dysfunctional families are the rule, not the exception. That has had me thinking. I'd like to impart my experience onto a younger generation. If only the me of today could speak to the me when I was 12 to 15 years old, my life would be dramatically different. And if there were guys out there... even adults with lots of mileage left in their lives, there are things I would want to say to them so that could benefit and become real men. If you're over 50, think about it. What would the 50 year old you say to the 15 year old you that would change the balance of your life for the better? Our problem is that many of today's youth don't have the opportunity to become a man. There are pressures from the LGBTQP community to become a fairy. The MSM looks down on real men. They build false narratives and use buzz words to camouflage what they're doing. We need this discussion. We need to talk about what we should teach the youth of today that would prepare them and make them better people and to become real men. Would anyone like to participate? Yes sir, i would love to participate. Thank you affording this great opportunity. Just guessing here, am thinking i may actually be the youngest one on the forum,[*mid-30s] and if so then i suppose that alone would qualify me as a student,...and yet i'd definitely have a few things to say to 15yo me if that were possible. Hey actually, this might serve to assist this threads development; Once upon a time [*mid-1980s, there was a young couple who bore a child [*me], then shortly after they bore two[*her, three*] more boys. The young hastily married couple were a teenaged dude[19yo][*farmer] and a teenaged chick[17yo][,...ahh,... ...đ¤...in modern terms i guess she would have been](*& still is)
They were supported by the dude's elderly parents[*~70-80yo] and he worked on their dairy farm while the chick lazed about/paraded around as if to be the perfect "good/loyal wife/mother".
To be fair, they both did the only the best they could, though after ~5ish years, stresses of 3[+1] children, an overworked[~80+h/w] husband/father, an insatiable abusive wife/mother, their combined drug/alcohol/party indulgences, and all the major internal & extended family dramas the wife/mother created constantly,...these pressures ultimately exceeded manageable thresholds and so kablam!âshtfam!
He[*the husband/father] had already secretly shacked up with some other chick.[*and i suspect it's partly coz he also knew something that took me 30years to realizeâtheir 4th child is not his.]
She[*the wife/mother][*i now know is highly dysfunctional] did what she knew best,...and ditched the no longer advantageous; "wife/mother costume" and threw on/revealed a shiney new disguise; the "Perpetual Victim".
However she had already caused so much unnecessary chaos amongst a reasonably large and well established family, and prior to that even, she had alienated herself from her own family. So sheâ& her manipulations simply did not stand a chance against the combined defenses,...and so she grabbed the 4 kids and dragged them right across the countryâfar away from it all,...and landed the five of them in a steaming pile of,...đ¤...urban unpleasantries.
Before age ~9, i got to experience such wonderful things like; major family dramas, drunk/drugged out young adults and me & my bros were often left sleeping in the car whilst they partied, and of course the experience of a family break-up.
[*i have a lot of strange memories of the drunken drives home.]
After age ~9, i got to experience the beneficial[*sarc] education of a solo motherâand a series of "new dads", and being used as unwitting weapons in the family court system and so forth.
If ya'z know about the basic dynamics[*the individual roles] within a "narcissistic family unit", "mum" was the "main narcissist", i[*1st son] was switched between "Golden Child", "Scapegoat", "Surrogate Parent" status, my younger bro[*2nd] has always a mix of the "Enabler", "Mascot", "Flying Monkey"â& now full blown adult "Narcopath"/"Malignant Narcissist". The next bro[*3rd] was/is sometimes the backup/alternative "Golden Child", "Scapegoat", "Surrogate Parent.â& now full blown "Covert (type) adult Narcissist". The youngest[*4th], he still doesn't know he has a different father, which i think may have contributed to why "mum" always treated/doted on him like a lost puppy, he was always the "Lost, or Needy Child".
Sometime in 1995, the three bros and i got to live through a crazy late night experience with our "mother".
We had no clue what was even going on at the time, but one night she frantically dragged us oughta bed, jammed us in this new V6 Holden Commodore she'd just ticked up, and proceeded to hysterically ramble/cry/spaz outâwhile speeding along what seemed to be endless backroads.
At some point i woke up coz of the swerving and loud sounds of gravel thrashing against the left side of the car[*NZers drive on the left side], i saw that my bros were all asleep, "mums" frazzled hair and erratically moving silhouette indicated i best keep silent.
Though i kept watching,...
...and i witnessed,...
...as she seemed to be attempting to pull overâexceptâthis was at an unreasonably highspeed, even i knew how dangerous this was, i became overcome with fear,...in frozen contrast to the blurred-vaguely tree colored shapes grew closer as this visual haze zoomed by to my left.
The last moments of conscious memory recall a slightly silhouetted highpoint of the unlit straight road up ahead, we were headed uphillâ approaching the highpoint, and there was another vehicle coming from the other direction.
Within seconds its lights glared into view, couldn't make out what it was at first, though for a fraction of a second out the left rear passenger window past my youngest infant brother âas "mum" suddenly swerved right, basically sliding the car sideways into the path of the oncoming vehicle,...when i saw what was a typical tractor/trailer unit[*truck] as it slammed into the car,...and everything went dark.
Ok, so it's late here and i gotta hit the hay, though had hoped to share more of the experiences of a young modern man who's managed toâeventuallyâfind his way out of the dysfunctional abyss of the increasingly"normalized" modern inverted family/social life.
Coz i think that by doing so, not only is itâtbhâcathartic, it might also provide a bit of useful insight into the perspectives of the modern dysfunctional adult-children.
Dunno, it's just that i generally find that in order to fixâor become proficient at something, i gotta really get to know the ins & outs and how it all fits together.
â˘If you'd[*any reader] like, i could continue adding to this tomorrow.
đđ
Good night, and bless.
Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 17:15:13 GMT
Well, apparently around 75%[*several hours writing] of my previous post just vanished. Will have to fix this tomorrow coz it's late and i gotta crash out. Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk Some of your posts are excessively long. It could be that due to the number of links, over-use of images, etc. your posts are being flagged and truncated (a fancy word for shortened or edited.) Some boards limit the characters. If you are going to use links and images, you may want to limit the number in a given post. It's difficult. Most people only have an attention span to read three paragraphs and I tend to do more, but I'm not posting images and lots of smileys, strange characters within a sentence, etc. Yeah, it'd be nice to see a little more positive feedback or constructive encouragement rather than stuff like; "your posts are too excessive". Coz that sorta thing, especially from the "Admin", does kinda make it seem like my efforts are generally worthless ya know. i am the way i am, i post the way i post, and if this isn't up to the expected standards then that's fine with me, though if my posting is a problem i'd prefer not to waste anyones time fumbling about attempting to self censor and simply be told, "hey look dude, yo just too dang crazy for us, please leave the forum at once." So anyway, i didn't actually include any links in that vanished post, and had only added one quote image at the end, pretty sure i didn't use more than probably 2-3 emojis as well. Tbh, i was unaware emojis were aggravating for some peeps, it's kinda humourous actually, each to their own. Do you know what the character limit is for individual posts, or is there some way to find out? Regardless whether some possess attention spans of goldfish or not, i put a fair bit of time and effort into most of my posts, particularly the one in this thread,...so i'm sure it is understandably frustrating to hit "Post" and most of it instantly pops oughta existence aye. Thanks Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 17:42:23 GMT
Since at least one person is getting some benefit from this thread, I will get to the point: Recently, a woman got onto a local board that I visit. She said her son was being unruly and causing her problems. She wanted to know if there were any organizations that had a Big Brother program so that her son might meet someone that could be a male role model. Well, of course, she got a lot of posts from feminists telling her not to " let some random man" advise her child and other lefty women began asking her how she was doing. BTW, I volunteered to mentor the boy. Having been a DFACS asset (that's a foster parent that takes in children for the government when children are taken out of the home) I think I have some qualifications. Add to that I do have a degree in Christian Education. Needless to say, that went nowhere. What we're looking at today are massive numbers of children that are being brought up by their mother. Divorce is rampant and most of the time the child is put into the custody of the mother. We are a nation of absent fathers. Add to that we are also a nation that is a couple of generations into having males that grew up in fatherless homes. So, you have a young man who is growing up without his father and, even if the father cares, the father grew up in a fatherless home. Add to that the number of children in dysfunctional homes where there is physical and / or emotional abuse, drugs, violence, neglect, etc., etc. and a dark picture begins to emerge. Today, the average white male is saddled with every possible disadvantage they can encounter. Most lack a good father figure and the most influential person in any young person's life is the same sex parent. The mothers have been programmed to think my body, my baby and the father plays no role outside of being the sperm donor and financial revenue generating resource for the " woman's baby." We have a couple of generations of males that think they are ladies. The LGBTQP community is filled with people from broken homes with a mother raising the children. So, I'm seeing teens up to guys in their 40s and beyond that cannot think, reason or act like a man. Add to that, our lifestyles that are concentrated in high sugar / fats for a diet and a lack of hard work, it gives you males with low testosterone, unable to perform adequately during sexual encounters. The average " man" of today doesn't read. Most people find ten paragraphs on a discussion board to be a wall of text. They have no real skillsets. Check the colleges and trade schools. Most of the people in attendance are women and nonwhites (and most of them from foreign countries.) Women are taking the lead role and becoming the preachers in the churches. Ditto for most of the elected positions within government. It is shameful and it is disgusting. But, by the lack of views on this thread, we cannot really solve the problem until people admit that a problem exists. When I post again, it won't matter whether a person is 14 or 50 (or anywhere in between) they should begin to get exposure to what they should have learned. Mate you're on point! Believe it or not my vanished post was specifically related to giving a perspective from one of these modern fatherless adult-children. This subject is important and the best way to solve something is to learn as much about that something as is possible. i obviously wouldn't know if you've personally experienced being brought up in a modern dysfunctional solo-female family unit. If not, would you like me to hook ya up with first hand insight? Was going to redo the vanished post, though, i dunno,...the prospect of it vanishing again and tbh the lingering thought that my posts might essentially be considered as nothing but an annoyance, doesn't really elicit motivation to botherâyet i still want to, simply because you seem to be asking for help and i love helping. Anyways, let me know if you would like some insight,...i have a bunch of fruit trees to plant right now. Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 20:50:59 GMT
#[Vanished post, take #2]
Once upon a time [*mid-1980s, there was a young couple who bore a child [*me], then shortly after they bore two[*her, three*] more boys.
The young hastily married couple were a teenaged dude[19yo][*farmer] and a teenaged chick[17yo] [,...ahh,... she...in modern terms i guess would have been](*& still is)...a "Thot", or "Golddigger",...basically a predatory female.]
They were supported by his elderly parents and while he worked on their large dairy farm 80-100+ hours p/w, she pranced about performing a fake role as if the ideal wife/mother,...during that time she set about creating all-sorts of chaos between the entended family members.
All this pressure eventually erupted shortly after my youngest [half]brother was born, and as he's clearly fathered by someone else, that was enough to trigger the whole family on dad's side to justifiably turned on her.
[*Dad was also cheating with another woman, so he wasn't innocent.]
From this point dad ditched "mum" and started another family, while "mum" threw off her "perfect wife/mother" costume, replacing it with the "Perpetual Victim" get up,...then dragged my brothers and i across the country only to land in a steaming pile of urbanized unpleasantries.
i was around 7-8yo, when shtf, and the until 18yo my bros & i were used as weapons through the family court system against our now alienated father.
At age ~9, "mum" & the latest extremely violent "new dad" had a big falling out late one night and he left her.
Both probably drugged out or something, i dunno,...but whatever it was led to "mum" hysterically waking us four boys and throwing us in the car before frantically driving along seemingly endless back roads, this was the first time i saw a crazy person coz she was literally feral, rambling nonsensically, swerving all over the road at high speeds.
â˘End of part #1
Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 21:32:19 GMT
#[Vanished post, take #2] Once upon a time [*mid-1980s, there was a young couple who bore a child [*me], then shortly after they bore two[*her, three*] more boys. The young hastily married couple were a teenaged dude[19yo][*farmer] and a teenaged chick[17yo] [,...ahh,... she...in modern terms i guess would have been](*& still is)...a "Thot", or "Golddigger",...basically a predatory female.] They were supported by his elderly parents and while he worked on their large dairy farm 80-100+ hours p/w, she pranced about performing a fake role as if the ideal wife/mother,...during that time she set about creating all-sorts of chaos between the entended family members. All this pressure eventually erupted shortly after my youngest [half]brother was born, and as he's clearly fathered by someone else, that was enough to trigger the whole family on dad's side to justifiably turned on her. [*Dad was also cheating with another woman, so he wasn't innocent.] From this point dad ditched "mum" and started another family, while "mum" threw off her "perfect wife/mother" costume, replacing it with the "Perpetual Victim" get up,...then dragged my brothers and i across the country only to land in a steaming pile of urbanized unpleasantries. i was around 7-8yo, when shtf, and the until 18yo my bros & i were used as weapons through the family court system against our now alienated father. At age ~9, "mum" & the latest extremely violent "new dad" had a big falling out late one night and he left her. Both probably drugged out or something, i dunno,...but whatever it was led to "mum" hysterically waking us four boys and throwing us in the car before frantically driving along seemingly endless back roads, this was the first time i saw a crazy person coz she was literally feral, rambling nonsensically, swerving all over the road at high speeds. â˘End of part #1 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #2 At some point us kids fell asleep and i awoke to the loud sounds of gravel blasting up the side of the car, "mum" was still going nuts so i just sat watching as she seemed to be attempting to pull overâbut at high speed. We were going slightly up hill and i could see the light coming from another vehicle just over the highpoint and headed towards us from the other direction. Couldn't make out what it was beyond two glaring headlights though and didn't think much of it anyway. "Mum" was still attempting this highspeed pullover thing right up until just before the other vehicle passed by,...when she suddenly swerved towards it and so for a fraction of a second i watched as the towering front of a big rig/tractor trailer unit slammed into the passenger side,...then nothing but darkness. i do recall a few fleeting glimpses of flashing lights as i must've drifted in and out of consciousness, finally waking in a blinding hospital room with like ten panicked doctors & nurses telling me to stay awake but i had absolutely no clue at that stage about what had happened so i tried to get up to escape but my legs didn't work and the hospital staff pinned me down before injecting something that put me out cold. my youngest[infant] half bro was in ICU for two weeks as he'd been in a booster seat on the rear passenger seat directly where the truck impacted, he's still covered in wicked scars today. The other two bros where badly cut up with glass fragments, we all were, and i was completely paralyzed from the waist down for about three & a half days before feeling started to return. "Mum" was totally uninjured, which doesn't make sense coz she didn't even have any glass shards buried in her face like the rest of us,...and even worse, is that i remember the huge local media fuss and officials visiting us and instead of being distressed throughout the whole ordeal, "mum" seemed to be basking in the spotlight, piling up donations, gifts, etc. Police investigators never spoke to me or my bros and so i never got a chance to tell of what i saw. "Mum" convinced everyone that she was the victim in all this was praised in local papers as an example of a heroic solo-mother. To this day i am the only other that knows the Truth and my bros think i'm lying whenever i've tried telling them what she did that night. â˘End of part #2 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 22:24:10 GMT
#[Vanished post, take #2] Once upon a time [*mid-1980s, there was a young couple who bore a child [*me], then shortly after they bore two[*her, three*] more boys. The young hastily married couple were a teenaged dude[19yo][*farmer] and a teenaged chick[17yo] [,...ahh,... she...in modern terms i guess would have been](*& still is)...a "Thot", or "Golddigger",...basically a predatory female.] They were supported by his elderly parents and while he worked on their large dairy farm 80-100+ hours p/w, she pranced about performing a fake role as if the ideal wife/mother,...during that time she set about creating all-sorts of chaos between the entended family members. All this pressure eventually erupted shortly after my youngest [half]brother was born, and as he's clearly fathered by someone else, that was enough to trigger the whole family on dad's side to justifiably turned on her. [*Dad was also cheating with another woman, so he wasn't innocent.] From this point dad ditched "mum" and started another family, while "mum" threw off her "perfect wife/mother" costume, replacing it with the "Perpetual Victim" get up,...then dragged my brothers and i across the country only to land in a steaming pile of urbanized unpleasantries. i was around 7-8yo, when shtf, and the until 18yo my bros & i were used as weapons through the family court system against our now alienated father. At age ~9, "mum" & the latest extremely violent "new dad" had a big falling out late one night and he left her. Both probably drugged out or something, i dunno,...but whatever it was led to "mum" hysterically waking us four boys and throwing us in the car before frantically driving along seemingly endless back roads, this was the first time i saw a crazy person coz she was literally feral, rambling nonsensically, swerving all over the road at high speeds. â˘End of part #1 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #2 At some point us kids fell asleep and i awoke to the loud sounds of gravel blasting up the side of the car, "mum" was still going nuts so i just sat watching as she seemed to be attempting to pull overâbut at high speed. We were going slightly up hill and i could see the light coming from another vehicle just over the highpoint and headed towards us from the other direction. Couldn't make out what it was beyond two glaring headlights though and didn't think much of it anyway. "Mum" was still attempting this highspeed pullover thing right up until just before the other vehicle passed by,...when she suddenly swerved towards it and so for a fraction of a second i watched as the towering front of a big rig/tractor trailer unit slammed into the passenger side,...then nothing but darkness. i do recall a few fleeting glimpses of flashing lights as i must've drifted in and out of consciousness, finally waking in a blinding hospital room with like ten panicked doctors & nurses telling me to stay awake but i had absolutely no clue at that stage about what had happened so i tried to get up to escape but my legs didn't work and the hospital staff pinned me down before injecting something that put me out cold. my youngest[infant] half bro was in ICU for two weeks as he'd been in a booster seat on the rear passenger seat directly where the truck impacted, he's still covered in wicked scars today. The other two bros where badly cut up with glass fragments, we all were, and i was completely paralyzed from the waist down for about three & a half days before feeling started to return. "Mum" was totally uninjured, which doesn't make sense coz she didn't even have any glass shards buried in her face like the rest of us,...and even worse, is that i remember the huge local media fuss and officials visiting us and instead of being distressed throughout the whole ordeal, "mum" seemed to be basking in the spotlight, piling up donations, gifts, etc. Police investigators never spoke to me or my bros and so i never got a chance to tell of what i saw. "Mum" convinced everyone that she was the victim in all this was praised in local papers as an example of a heroic solo-mother. To this day i am the only other that knows the Truth and my bros think i'm lying whenever i've tried telling them what she did that night. â˘End of part #2 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #3 After we left the hospital, things went back to the usual craziness and "mum" got back together with the violent "new dad" and we had to witness him beating her senseless quite regular for the next decade, but he left once i was almost big enough to actually put up a fight against him. However that's about when "new dad number 2" came into the picture. He was a midrange drug dealer & involved with local gangs. Luckily my bros & i were males because "mum" actually tried to prostitute us out for drugs on numerous occasions during our teens,...the first time i realized this i was around 17yo when she got me into bedroom where she acted unusually friendly to me[*she only ever treated me in particular with outright disgust & hatefulness] at the time i was suspicious but just so frickin happy to be treated nicely by this woman so i didn't expect when this bigwig drug dealer dude barged in the room grinning at me weirdly. They gleefully chatted for a couple of minutes and he sorta slowly moved closer to me while they laughed & joked. He also handed her a large baggie of what i presume was meth or something, before he randomly reached his left arm around me grabbing my ass. Honestly that caught me off guard aye, didn't know how to react,...and went into limbic system autopilot,...more specificallyâ"fight mode",...i was half this dude's size and if in any other situation he'd have crushed me, though in this case the flurry of fists against face was sufficient that he fled. She sold what little i had in my room in the days following while i was at work,...and when i got home on the following friday, which was payday[*after i'd already transferred the next week's board to her account] low and beholdâall my clothes 'n' stuff were dumped out on the road and already ransacked apparently. Didn't even bother grabbing any of it, instead i went to a mates to get drunk. After that i rented a rundown motel unit til i found a cheap house to rent. my brothers and everyone we knew were told some kind of story in which i had supposedly done something terrible to our "innocent" "mother" and they all seemed to enjoy treating me like a POS after thatâand it only got worse as the years went by. Wasn't till i was about 24-25ish that i started learning psychology and learned of the dynamics of "narcissistic family units",... realizing that i had been designated the "Scapegoat" role. â˘End of part #3 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 22:56:05 GMT
â˘Part #2 At some point us kids fell asleep and i awoke to the loud sounds of gravel blasting up the side of the car, "mum" was still going nuts so i just sat watching as she seemed to be attempting to pull overâbut at high speed. We were going slightly up hill and i could see the light coming from another vehicle just over the highpoint and headed towards us from the other direction. Couldn't make out what it was beyond two glaring headlights though and didn't think much of it anyway. "Mum" was still attempting this highspeed pullover thing right up until just before the other vehicle passed by,...when she suddenly swerved towards it and so for a fraction of a second i watched as the towering front of a big rig/tractor trailer unit slammed into the passenger side,...then nothing but darkness. i do recall a few fleeting glimpses of flashing lights as i must've drifted in and out of consciousness, finally waking in a blinding hospital room with like ten panicked doctors & nurses telling me to stay awake but i had absolutely no clue at that stage about what had happened so i tried to get up to escape but my legs didn't work and the hospital staff pinned me down before injecting something that put me out cold. my youngest[infant] half bro was in ICU for two weeks as he'd been in a booster seat on the rear passenger seat directly where the truck impacted, he's still covered in wicked scars today. The other two bros where badly cut up with glass fragments, we all were, and i was completely paralyzed from the waist down for about three & a half days before feeling started to return. "Mum" was totally uninjured, which doesn't make sense coz she didn't even have any glass shards buried in her face like the rest of us,...and even worse, is that i remember the huge local media fuss and officials visiting us and instead of being distressed throughout the whole ordeal, "mum" seemed to be basking in the spotlight, piling up donations, gifts, etc. Police investigators never spoke to me or my bros and so i never got a chance to tell of what i saw. "Mum" convinced everyone that she was the victim in all this was praised in local papers as an example of a heroic solo-mother. To this day i am the only other that knows the Truth and my bros think i'm lying whenever i've tried telling them what she did that night. â˘End of part #2 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #3 After we left the hospital, things went back to the usual craziness and "mum" got back together with the violent "new dad" and we had to witness him beating her senseless quite regular for the next decade, but he left once i was almost big enough to actually put up a fight against him. However that's about when "new dad number 2" came into the picture. He was a midrange drug dealer & involved with local gangs. Luckily my bros & i were males because "mum" actually tried to prostitute us out for drugs on numerous occasions during our teens,...the first time i realized this i was around 17yo when she got me into bedroom where she acted unusually friendly to me[*she only ever treated me in particular with outright disgust & hatefulness] at the time i was suspicious but just so frickin happy to be treated nicely by this woman so i didn't expect when this bigwig drug dealer dude barged in the room grinning at me weirdly. They gleefully chatted for a couple of minutes and he sorta slowly moved closer to me while they laughed & joked. He also handed her a large baggie of what i presume was meth or something, before he randomly reached his left arm around me grabbing my ass. Honestly that caught me off guard aye, didn't know how to react,...and went into limbic system autopilot,...more specificallyâ"fight mode",...i was half this dude's size and if in any other situation he'd have crushed me, though in this case the flurry of fists against face was sufficient that he fled. She sold what little i had in my room in the days following while i was at work,...and when i got home on the following friday, which was payday[*after i'd already transferred the next week's board to her account] low and beholdâall my clothes 'n' stuff were dumped out on the road and already ransacked apparently. Didn't even bother grabbing any of it, instead i went to a mates to get drunk. After that i rented a rundown motel unit til i found a cheap house to rent. my brothers and everyone we knew were told some kind of story in which i had supposedly done something terrible to our "innocent" "mother" and they all seemed to enjoy treating me like a POS after thatâand it only got worse as the years went by. Wasn't till i was about 24-25ish that i started learning psychology and learned of the dynamics of "narcissistic family units",... realizing that i had been designated the "Scapegoat" role. â˘End of part #3 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #4 i dropped oughta school at 15 and by 16 had scored a full-time job house painting, though frankly i was a total screw up. Spent pretty much all my wages on drugs/alcohol and did bugger all other than getting into a lot of trouble, fighting and stuff. This continued into my early 20s. When i was 18, a 16yo friend was murdered my an old primary school mate, and at age 20 a girlfriends 16yo brother hung himself in a sleepout i'd been boarding in. He did that while some friends and i were just outside drinking and we didn't know til i bust down the door a full day later. Several months after that, while boarding with one of my brothers i was woken one night by the bro standing in my bedroom doorway ranting & raving nonsensically, similar to how "mum" had done the night she crashed the car. He abruptly stopped the ranting and in a creepy polite manner asked that i come to the kitchen to see something, so i went to see what his deal was. In the moments it took me to walk down the hallway, he'd gone to the kitchen pulled out & dumped the cutlery draws onto the dinning room tableâand was already waiting with several large knives in each handâlike Edward Scissorhands, when i walked in. He immediately charged. There wasn't time to even register what was happening, and i don't know why but i automatically stepped towards himâlaunching into a flying headbutt which knocked him out. Never told anyone this bit before, i still haven't forgiven myself for doing that to my little brotherâdespite the situation. Anyways i freaked out after the headbutt, and as ridiculous as this seems now, i actually thought at the time that i might've killed him. He regained consciousness after probably 30 seconds at most, and seemed to be completely oblivious to what just happenedâhe literally seemed like his normal sober self and we even sat for a few minutes chatting. He seemed happy as at first, but suddenly stopped talking and glared at me in silence for at least a minute before smiling as he headed towards his room saying he's got a surprise for me. â˘End of part #4 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 3, 2022 23:35:30 GMT
â˘Part #3 After we left the hospital, things went back to the usual craziness and "mum" got back together with the violent "new dad" and we had to witness him beating her senseless quite regular for the next decade, but he left once i was almost big enough to actually put up a fight against him. However that's about when "new dad number 2" came into the picture. He was a midrange drug dealer & involved with local gangs. Luckily my bros & i were males because "mum" actually tried to prostitute us out for drugs on numerous occasions during our teens,...the first time i realized this i was around 17yo when she got me into bedroom where she acted unusually friendly to me[*she only ever treated me in particular with outright disgust & hatefulness] at the time i was suspicious but just so frickin happy to be treated nicely by this woman so i didn't expect when this bigwig drug dealer dude barged in the room grinning at me weirdly. They gleefully chatted for a couple of minutes and he sorta slowly moved closer to me while they laughed & joked. He also handed her a large baggie of what i presume was meth or something, before he randomly reached his left arm around me grabbing my ass. Honestly that caught me off guard aye, didn't know how to react,...and went into limbic system autopilot,...more specificallyâ"fight mode",...i was half this dude's size and if in any other situation he'd have crushed me, though in this case the flurry of fists against face was sufficient that he fled. She sold what little i had in my room in the days following while i was at work,...and when i got home on the following friday, which was payday[*after i'd already transferred the next week's board to her account] low and beholdâall my clothes 'n' stuff were dumped out on the road and already ransacked apparently. Didn't even bother grabbing any of it, instead i went to a mates to get drunk. After that i rented a rundown motel unit til i found a cheap house to rent. my brothers and everyone we knew were told some kind of story in which i had supposedly done something terrible to our "innocent" "mother" and they all seemed to enjoy treating me like a POS after thatâand it only got worse as the years went by. Wasn't till i was about 24-25ish that i started learning psychology and learned of the dynamics of "narcissistic family units",... realizing that i had been designated the "Scapegoat" role. â˘End of part #3 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk â˘Part #4 i dropped oughta school at 15 and by 16 had scored a full-time job house painting, though frankly i was a total screw up. Spent pretty much all my wages on drugs/alcohol and did bugger all other than getting into a lot of trouble, fighting and stuff. This continued into my early 20s. When i was 18, a 16yo friend was murdered my an old primary school mate, and at age 20 a girlfriends 16yo brother hung himself in a sleepout i'd been boarding in. He did that while some friends and i were just outside drinking and we didn't know til i bust down the door a full day later. Several months after that, while boarding with one of my brothers i was woken one night by the bro standing in my bedroom doorway ranting & raving nonsensically, similar to how "mum" had done the night she crashed the car. He abruptly stopped the ranting and in a creepy polite manner asked that i come to the kitchen to see something, so i went to see what his deal was. In the moments it took me to walk down the hallway, he'd gone to the kitchen pulled out & dumped the cutlery draws onto the dinning room tableâand was already waiting with several large knives in each handâlike Edward Scissorhands, when i walked in. He immediately charged. There wasn't time to even register what was happening, and i don't know why but i automatically stepped towards himâlaunching into a flying headbutt which knocked him out. Never told anyone this bit before, i still haven't forgiven myself for doing that to my little brotherâdespite the situation. Anyways i freaked out after the headbutt, and as ridiculous as this seems now, i actually thought at the time that i might've killed him. He regained consciousness after probably 30 seconds at most, and seemed to be completely oblivious to what just happenedâhe literally seemed like his normal sober self and we even sat for a few minutes chatting. He seemed happy as at first, but suddenly stopped talking and glared at me in silence for at least a minute before smiling as he headed towards his room saying he's got a surprise for me. â˘End of part #4 Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk Oh cool, stoked to see you posting mr weaponoffreedom. â˘Part #5 So there's me sitting with my back to the hallway, were little bro was getting the "surprise" from his room. Didn't even hear him sneak up and was surprised when he wrapped an arm around my neck from behind as he whispered something which i do not recallâthen everything went dark. Would've been a few seconds before coming to and seeing the ceilingâthen him and his completely black eyes as he leapt over the flipped chairs & table with a large metal thing he was mid-bringing down at my face. [It was an aluminum "Patu", the design of which is of a traditional MÄori head splitting weapon.] Apparently while i was unconscious he'd already cracked my skull, blood everywhere, in my eyes, everything was blurry as aye, and i couldn't do anything except block this next blow with my right arm. This opened up a massive gash, severing the tricep tendons and basically crippled that arm. He was trying to actually kill me and would've if not for some burst of adrenaline which allowed me to kick the nearest chairs enough to trip him and i semi-scrambleâcrawled to &;then out the front door with him hot on my heels screaming wildly. Didn't even look back, i just ran as best i could, though barely coz of the blood loss. Managed to get away somehow, eventually making it to "mums" bfs place where i passed out in the driveway, luckily she was doing her methed out midnight gardening and saw me, so i didn't just bleed out right there. Woke up the next day in agony, tendons like bits of spaghetti curling out from the arm, gaping swollen head wound with flaps of scalp sticking up,...though she refused to call or take me to the hospital.
It was her druggy bf who helped by telling her how outrageous it was not to get medical assistance, she did take me but only after making me swear not to tell anyone what happened.
Found out months later that before little bro had awoken me that night, he'd been smoking meth with "mum".
â˘End of part #5
If this is too much, please say so.
i'll continue part #6 tomorrow, and will be getting into how i've escaped the family and gone "No Contact" to where i am at currently.
Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk
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Post by curiousfiend on Nov 4, 2022 5:14:00 GMT
Maybe I'm expecting too much out of this thread, but I'll plug along so that you get a gist of what I was going to say: Most of us probably came from dysfunctional families. OTOH, dysfunctional as they may be, I recall a time when fathers used to let their sons buy a junk car at about the age of 14. After a year or so of father and son bonding over rebuilding the car, the young man would get a learner's permit and learn to drive. The young man already had a skillset of being able to work on cars. Today kids don't bond over fixing cars or motorcycles. IF they bond, it's over sharing a joint, a cigarette, or maybe hard core illegal drugs. Like most people I came from a highly dysfunctional family. The old man would beat his kids (and we're talking bones getting broken.) He beat on my mother until I was a teen. I have a younger brother that suffers from self esteem issues despite being far more talented in most things compared to me. Our beatings were legendary in the neighborhood. The difference between myself and my siblings is that when the old man was in the pokey (jail / prison) I sought out father figures that lived in situations that were what I wanted to be like. It has never made sense to me why most children will mimic their parents, even adopting all their destructive behaviors. But, that is the way it is. As I got older (starting at about 17) I did a lot of babysitting. In my adult years I became a foster parent. In between I tried to help all kinds of guys from various age groups to find their way and be more successful. If you missed something at the age of 11 or so (even earlier) it doesn't matter how old you are now, it's never too late to go back to the basics and start doing things right. Early in life we should have learned values. That is increasingly difficult for a myriad of reasons. Divorce, drug abuse, the government being the nation's largest drug supplier, laws that interfere with parents ability to discipline their children, and a nation that has divorced themselves from God are all leading the pack - followed by political propaganda by the LGBTQP community to convert straight people to bi, gay, binary, etc., etc. AND the multiculturalists rewriting history. Then you have the atheists that LIE every time you get into a debate about our nation's history. Tell the truth that America was founded on Christian principles and you get a debate from lying, whiny liberals that try to make it a debate about theocracy. America was not founded as a theocracy. It's foundational principles are rooted in the Christian faith. Our commitment to the Rights to Life, Liberty, and ownership of personal property are uniquely Christian. SOME other faiths have some of the same tents of faith; however, when it comes to things like sending missionaries out into the world, it was the United States that started sending those missionaries out. The Background: According to Todd Johnson, director of the Center for the Study of Global Christianity at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, in 2010 the U.S. sent out one out of every four missionariesâ-127,000 of the worldâs estimated 400,000 missionaries. In distant second place is Brazil, which sent 34,000 missionaries abroad. We fight world's wars, give money out as if every American were rich beyond their wildest dreams and the comparative wealth of Christians in this country is beyond astounding: www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2018/07/31/americans-are-far-more-religious-than-adults-in-other-wealthy-nations/The one thing that amazed me about the MAGA movement is that people wanted to pass more laws to take them to a place they had already been. To draw you an analogy, suppose you had a decent running car, but you kept putting junk on it until it couldn't perform like it used to. So, if you want it to run like it used to, why not take the junk off it and replace it with what you had? Why add more junk, hoping that your car would perform like it used to? But, that's what we do in society. And that takes us to the people on the right. I'm not going to preach to you or try to convert you, but this is the way it is in the United Socialist States of Amerika right now. Americans lead the world in drug use. Americans consume over 80 percent of the world's opioid supply and, in general, lead the world in illegal drug use (next to New Zealand proportionally): www.cbsnews.com/news/us-leads-the-world-in-illegal-drug-use/America has more people in prison than any country on the planet and for every drug addict in a rehab facility, more than ten are in prison. In raw numbers the United States is second in the world when it comes to abortion (China with a population in the BILLIONS is first.) And our religious leaders don't help. They tell their flocks that we are no longer under the law. The Bible defines sin as the transgression of the law. If we are no longer under the law then there is no sin. Or so the nominal church world has taught the sheeple. They claim if you're paid up and prayed up, pay your tithes and accept Christ, some day you will be raptured out and go off into the high heavens - all of which is absolute trash that has added to our lack of values. But, these NEW WORLD ORDER Christians can be gay, bi, transsexual, binary; they can be liars, thieves, pedophiles, socialists, communists, and engage in miscegenation and it's good so long as they say they're " saved." I'll finish the thought while you consider this so far. As consistently demonstrated, you're definitely on point for the most part, though that's pertaining to the core info and not the additional subjective interpretationsâ& that cheeky little trick. It creates an unavoidably incongruous pattern, like i'd explained to you on another post. Unsure yet whether you're actually fully aware of doing this or not, however as you're undeniably highly intelligent, knowledgeable & etc,...then the latter is very unlikely. We both know i have tried to give ya fair head's up in almost every post, and there in lies the inherent meta-ironic nature of dealing with this sort of thing. "One can lead a horse to water,..." It means there is motivation,...and therefore deliberate intent. In this sort of case the intent is indicative of the nature of the motive. "ms ss cr n l rb r c" Most people "see" what they want to "see", regardless of yadda yadda. What is a man? It's merely a word to define yet another social construct. Why? What better way to control a thing than by constructing a fence around it. These words we use,... ...do you realize what they actuallyâTruly are? Seems like ya probably already do know quite well indeed aye. a b r a c a d a b r a a l a c a z a l l c o n s t r u c t i n g p h o n e t i c s c a s t s a s p e l l  Mucho gracias, unfortunately my time here is done. i must bid you farewell & Godspeed. Sent from my CPH2025 using Tapatalk |
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